Charlie's Diary

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Fri, 18 Jul 2003

Written out

I guess I should have seen this coming.

The weather's broken but I'm still feeling totally unlike working. Got a novella to re-write but trying to get to grips with it is like re-heating last night's left over takeaway: unappetizing and greasy. Also got a different novella to collaborate on, but it's really hard to generate enthusiasm. As for the original story I'm trying to write, don't get me started. For about the first time in two years I am feeling written out -- spectacularly so. The only thing holding me at the keyboard is residual guilt in the face of the load of work that is ever so slowly piling up as a backlog.

Luckily, nothing (except the collaboration, and I've got someone else to keep prodding me over that) is urgent. I should be able to take a week -- even a month -- off without problems, as long as I get down to work again afterwards. But the fear, what if I can't re-start when I come back to it, keeps nagging at me, keeping me sitting in front of the keyboard for an unproductive day of worrying when I ought to be relaxing, taking some time off to get my shit together. I have a secret curse: the ancient Jewish work ethic rides me like a goddamn vampire, sucking the pleasure out of lazing around.

Be it resolved: tomorrow I am going to go out and enjoy myself and go to a party in the evening and not write a word. Life's too short for self-inflicted guilt trips, and worrying that I won't be able to edit my way through the second draft of a novella if I take a week off once in a blue moon is, let's face it, bloody stupid.

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posted at: 21:57 | path: /writing | permanent link to this entry

specials:

Is SF About to Go Blind? -- Popular Science article by Greg Mone
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Inside the MIT Media Lab -- what it's like to spend a a day wandering around the Media Lab
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Some webby stuff I'm reading:


Engadget ]
Gizmodo ]
The Memory Hole ]
Boing!Boing! ]
Futurismic ]
Walter Jon Williams ]
Making Light (TNH) ]
Crooked Timber ]
Junius (Chris Bertram) ]
Baghdad Burning (Riverbend) ]
Bruce Sterling ]
Ian McDonald ]
Amygdala (Gary Farber) ]
Cyborg Democracy ]
Body and Soul (Jeanne d'Arc)  ]
Atrios ]
The Sideshow (Avedon Carol) ]
This Modern World (Tom Tomorrow) ]
Jesus's General ]
Mick Farren ]
Early days of a Better Nation (Ken MacLeod) ]
Respectful of Otters (Rivka) ]
Tangent Online ]
Grouse Today ]
Hacktivismo ]
Terra Nova ]
Whatever (John Scalzi) ]
GNXP ]
Justine Larbalestier ]
Yankee Fog ]
The Law west of Ealing Broadway ]
Cough the Lot ]
The Yorkshire Ranter ]
Newshog ]
Kung Fu Monkey ]
S1ngularity ]
Pagan Prattle ]
Gwyneth Jones ]
Calpundit ]
Lenin's Tomb ]
Progressive Gold ]
Kathryn Cramer ]
Halfway down the Danube ]
Fistful of Euros ]
Orcinus ]
Shrillblog ]
Steve Gilliard ]
Frankenstein Journal (Chris Lawson) ]
The Panda's Thumb ]
Martin Wisse ]
Kuro5hin ]
Advogato ]
Talking Points Memo ]
The Register ]
Cryptome ]
Juan Cole: Informed comment ]
Global Guerillas (John Robb) ]
Shadow of the Hegemon (Demosthenes) ]
Simon Bisson's Journal ]
Max Sawicky's weblog ]
Guy Kewney's mobile campaign ]
Hitherby Dragons ]
Counterspin Central ]
MetaFilter ]
NTKnow ]
Encyclopaedia Astronautica ]
Fafblog ]
BBC News (Scotland) ]
Pravda ]
Meerkat open wire service ]
Warren Ellis ]
Brad DeLong ]
Hullabaloo (Digby) ]
Jeff Vail ]
The Whiskey Bar (Billmon) ]
Groupthink Central (Yuval Rubinstein) ]
Unmedia (Aziz Poonawalla) ]
Rebecca's Pocket (Rebecca Blood) ]


Older stuff:

June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
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January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004
December 2003
November 2003
October 2003
September 2003
August 2003
July 2003
June 2003
May 2003
April 2003
March 2003
February 2003
January 2003
December 2002
November 2002
October 2002
September 2002
August 2002
July 2002
June 2002
May 2002
April 2002
March 2002
(I screwed the pooch in respect of the blosxom entry datestamps on March 28th, 2002, so everything before then shows up as being from the same time)



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