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The Policeman's Beard is Half-Constructed ...

And today's piece of gratuitous real-life surrealism is brought to you care of The Register, who report on PetPlan Insurance's survey of gadget-inflicted injuries to pets:

2.86% of guinea pigs admitted to veterinary hospitals in the survey had been injured by karaoke machines
I'm speechless; I just can't compete with this shit. Unlike John Scalzi, who committed this hideous crime against feline dignity in 2006, and who must be reminded of it at every opportunity:

bacon taped to a cat

13 Comments

1:

I bet there were exactly 35 guinea pigs in the survey.

2:

mmm... this power cable tastes nice...

3:

Heh; reading the original story over at the Register, I came across this link, for which there are no adequate words: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/10/13/fragrant_wal_mart_offer/

4:

Guinea Pigs are very sensitive to bad eighties music. It's not uncommon for one to keel over dead during a bad rendition of "Every Breath You Take".

5:

Or maybe after trying to "turn around, bright eyes" too many times, the guinea pigs spin themselves into nauseous unconsciousness.

6:

John has bacon taped to a cat. Cory has his red cape and goggles. Do you feel jealous not having an Internet meme to call your own? Maybe you should ask your fans to create one for you.

7:

Martin: no, I'm not jealous -- because I just finished a novel. 97,000 words in 33 days. Ouch! Take that, NaNoWriMo!

8:

Charlie@7:

Delighted to hear about your new 11 book per year schedule! You write 'em, I'll buy 'em ;)

Was that the one you were supposed to be writing, or the one you wanted to be writing?

9:

El Reg has always found ways to amuse, not least by way of comments posted by readers..

I also second your sentiments ref the bacon vs Cat.. as bad as putting tape on it's the paws and watching it bounce round insanely.

Congrats on the finished book. just you keep feeding my addiction :)

10:

No gadget problems here, but some years ago, one of the cats opened a very heavy drawer, got a piece of bead fabric out and ate the attached 12 feet of thread plus a needle. Fortunately, it all wadded up in the same place, so she only had one incision for her surgery. I keep the workroom door closed now.

11:

Actually Weird as this stuff is.. I think you do compete pretty well.. each of these items is only good for a couple of minutes enjoyment.. where as one of your books provides a minimum of a day, potentially much more if the meme's "take"!!

12:

Charlie you're only supposed to have done a rough outline for NaNoWriMo. NaNoWriMo = Fail!

Joking of course. Congratulations!

13:

That is a BIRMAN!

We've got Birmans! They have one failing - unspeakable cuteness. Would you like some photos, Charlie?

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This page contains a single entry by Charlie Stross published on October 17, 2008 2:06 PM.

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