I'm busy being a tourist in Sydney and can't think of a suitable topic for a rant right now, so in lieu of an extended essay, here's an interview:
You can ask me a question in the comments. Just one. I will answer if it pleases me to do so (and I will not answer questions that annoy or bore me or duplicate information in the FAQ or earlier answers). If I don't/can't answer but am not annoyed/bored I may issue you a coupon good for a second or subsequent question.
If there's a backlog of ten or more unanswered questions, don't bother posting until you see me answering the earlier ones. (Otherwise I may ignore you.)
Also note: I am in eastern Australia right now, nine hours ahead of the UK and 15 hours ahead of the US west coast. Nor am I an insomniac. If you get an instant answer, hey: someone got lucky!
So. Who's first?